January 31, 2017
10 Signs You Are Mom-Level Tired
I've never played Candy Crush on Facebook (or anyplace else, for that matter).
I understand this could be somewhere between amusing and bewildering. But the absence of Candy Crush in my personal history is not some sort of moral stance; it's just that if I have free time, I'd rather take a nap. And there are lots of other things most people have done that I've never dipped a toe into.(Working title for that post: "Stuff Most Other People Have Done That I Haven't.")
Anyway. From the little I know about this game, I gather there are numerous "levels" of achievement. Which made me think about levels of sleep deprivation and how mom-level exhaustion is equivalent to something along the lines of level 1500+ in Candy Crush?
As moms, we might not all play Candy Crush, but we are all tired. To confirm that you have, in fact, reached mom-level exhaustion, check yourself against these tell-tale signs.
1. You open the microwave to get something out of the toaster.
2. You brew a cup of coffee in your Keurig without putting a cup on the drip tray. Which is how you figure out that the smart people at Keurig designed the drip tray to hold exactly one cup of coffee. Very helpful.
3. When you watch a movie in which any scene is set in a bedroom, you gaze longingly at the bed and think how comfortable and inviting it looks and how you just want to CRAWL INTO IT FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING GOOD.
4. When you prepay for gas and the card reader asks "is this a debit card?" you are stymied by the question. Yes? No? Maybe? Really, this is just so confusing.
5. You see this in the checkout lane at the grocery store and immediately think, "Send the children to grandma's."
6. You throw a load of laundry into the washing machine without even realizing the load you did two days ago but never transferred to the dryer is still in there.
7. You frequently have a thought that goes something like this (often while standing, bewildered, in your pantry):
8. While making breakfast, you ask your daughter if she wants fruit or a spoon to go with her fork.
9. Your Mother's Day wish list looks like this:
10. You have no trouble whatsoever understanding why the most-viewed post I've ever put up was called "8 Ways to Fight Mom Exhaustion (Other Than Actually Getting More Sleep)."
11. You put 11 items on a 10-item list. (As long as you're here, though, I'l give you one more: you dream of nothing so much as a solid night's sleep.)
I promise it does get better, mamas. Teenage sleep is a THING, and it's fabulous for the teenager's mom, too. But in the meantime, what level of mom-tired are you at these days? If you're not so exhausted you can't even stand to answer the question, go ahead and share in a comment or on Facebook. And just know that scores of mom are nodding blearily in agreement.
**This post may have been shared at some of these blog bashes.**