April 15, 2015

Mucking Out the Barn (and what I made for a treat after I did it)

I love my barn.


And I love my daughters. (Much more than I love my barn.)


These sweet girls want to play basketball back in said barn, so it needed its annual post-winter muck-out.

This I did, and here's what I've got to say about it. You know that classic children's book, Everyone Poops? Well, it's true, and based on my muck-out morning, I can tell you that everyone who does it the most resided in my barn this winter.

But the barn is now cleaned out, and for this maternal labor of love, I am looking for a treat. So I'm making my skinnyish version of a Starbuck's Vanilla Bean Frappuccino. I call mine a "mockacinno" for wordplay reasons, but there is no coffee in it. Not that there couldn't be. Anyway, there are spins on this all over the Internet, so if you're looking for a vegan or Paleo or locavore or "all-natural" version, you have plenty of lovely options to choose from. Meanwhile, this is what works for me.

Vanilla Bean Mockaccino
(makes 1-2 servings)

1 cup milk (cow, nut, or otherwise), or more for desired consistency
1 cup ice cubes, or more for desired consistency
"caviar" from 1/2 split vanilla bean* (cut the whole bean in half crosswise, then slit one half lengthwise with a knife and scrape out that black paste made up of a zillion tiny gifts-from-God seeds)
2 tablespoons sugar-free French vanilla creamer, or more to taste
1/4 cup frozen reduced-fat non-dairy whipped topping, or more to taste
whipped cream for topping


*Yes, I know vanilla beans are crazy expensive. But they are SO worth the cost. My dear husband gifted me with a reasonably priced stash of them, and they are gorgeous. You'll love them. Use half of one in your Mockaccino and the other half to make Vanilla Bean Butter (unsalted butter, a pinch of salt, and the scrapings of half a vanilla bean). Which you will then spread on EVERYTHING.

Throw the milk, ice cubes, vanilla bean paste, and creamer into a blender. (Okay, fine. You can use vanilla extract if you want to make this while you're waiting for your shipment of vanilla beans to arrive.) Pulse/ice-crush/blend this mixture almost to oblivion, or until the ice cubes have submitted to your will for them. Add more milk or ice cubes or creamer to adjust the consistency or flavor according to your preference. Add in the frozen whipped topping and blend just to incorporate. Serve in a glass topped with whipped cream from one of those aerosol cans you can shoot directly into your mouth. Not that I would. Or have. But I will say that I considered it this morning when I was looking to free up refrigerator space.

So, the good news about spending my morning removing animal deposits from our barn is that it makes tomorrow's project--scraping peeling water-based paint off my daughter's bedroom floor because I AM AN IDIOT and put it directly over oil-based paint--seem like a day at the spa by comparison.

Next up once I finish the floor and get Anna's bedroom makeover finally done: "Tips and Tools for Tricking Your Closet into Thinking It's a Bedroom."

Gratefully shared at Weekend Wind Down Link Party and Motivation Monday!

1 comment:

  1. Everyone poops is a family favorite around here. And we love the book, too.

    ReplyDelete

I'd love to hear from you! Feel free to tell me what you really think. Years ago, I explained to my then-two-year that my appointment with a counselor was "sort of like going to a doctor who will help me be a better mommy." Without blinking, she replied, "You'd better go every day." All of which is just to say I've spent some time in the school of brutal honesty!