Oh, mama. I have such a heart-wrenching number of people in my life who have experienced trials and grief and loss lately.
Some of the losses are due to literal, physical death—unexpected, too-soon passings of people my sweet friends cannot imagine life without.
Some of the losses, though, have been caused by other kinds of death: the death of dreams or hopes or expectations of what would or could or should be. I’ve tried to check in with these women as they’ve journeyed through their seasons of sorrow—and admittedly, have done an unsteady job of it. Often, when I’ve asked how they are, they’ve answered, “I’m doing okay.” By which I understand they do not necessarily really mean "okay.”
From what I can glean from these brave friends and from my own experiences in OK-land, “I’m doing okay,” is sometimes just the easiest, most socially acceptable way of communicating, “I’m not good or fine. I’m something else, something complicated and messy that I’m not even sure about myself.”
I don’t pretend for one second to fully grasp what my friends mean when they say they’re “doing okay.” But I'm so honored to be over on Her View From Home, sharing a few possibilities that seem like they might honor the truth...
Once upon a Christmastime, there was a busy mom who had A
LOT to get done on Christmas Eve Day. She needed her children to be occupied
with something that did not require her involvement, oversight, or assistance,
so she suggested they plan an at-home Christmas Eve service for their family
that night.
The children disappeared into the playroom, and the mom disappeared
into the kitchen. The mom got her work done, and later that night, the children
“invited” their parents to a candlelit service in their living-room-turned-sanctuary.
The whole thing turned out to be the best Christmas gift since the original
Christmas Gift, and everyone lived (mostly) merrily ever after.
Of course, the mom in this little yuletide tale is me,
and the children are my now-teenage daughters. What has become our traditional
at-home family Christmas Eve service truly was born this way. I just threw the
“go plan a Christmas Eve service” suggestion at my daughters without really
expecting much. But year after year, they’ve surprised and delighted us with
hand-written “programs” and welcome signs and decorative lighting and
instrumental duets and readings and raps and dances and videos.
If you’re hoping to start a new family tradition that will
become a classic, head on over to Confessions of Parenting, where I'm honored to be sharing a few things I learned from our very accidental success.
Happy Christmas season! But enough with the preliminaries. I know you've got a list a mile long and about two seconds to spend on this page. I'm honored you're here at all, so I'll try to make it worth your while in a hurry.
1. If you need an alphabetical assortment of stocking stuffer suggestions: try this joint-effort list my girl Lisa the Syncopated Mama and I put together last year.
2. If you need a festive-looking gelatin salad with no weird chunks of anything in it: this Cherry Applesauce Salad made with fruit juice and unsweetened applesauce and one surprise ingredient that I PROMISE works. But please know that if chunky molded salads are THE thing that makes your family's holiday complete, that's fine, too. My people just happen to prefer smooth, and this salad slips right down.
1 12-oz can 100% juice apple-cherry frozen juice concentrate, thawed
Pour the water into a medium-sized saucepan and sprinkle the gelatin over the surface; allow to stand for one minute to soften. Dump in the sugar and cinnamon candies and stir. Cook over medium heat for 5-10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the sugar is dissolved and the candies are melted. Do not boil. Remove from heat and stir in the juice concentrate, followed by the applesauce. Pour into a pretty serving bowl and refrigerate several hours until set. Serves 6-8
7. If you need a real-life way to stay close to Jesus this season (and in the new year and, well, forever): the Daily TruthBytes for Moms app. Short devotionals, words from the Word, prayer paths...all delivered right to your phone. No guilt, just good stuff from God from some moms who need it themselves and figure someone else might need it, too. If you're an Android user, just search "TruthBytes" in the app store; Apple users can follow this link: https://www.etsy.com/listing/572641451/daily-truthbytes-for-moms-devotional-app.
8. If you need gifts that encourage and facilitate hospitality, especially if you, like me, are (ahem) "hospitality deficient": a hospitality planner or hospitality calendar from my friend Sue over at Welcome Heart.
9. If you need simply gorgeous free printable gift tags that would make a gift of a roll of toilet paper seem lavish:these from Write Them On My Heart.
10. If you need to refocus on what--Who--the season is really all about: this CHRISTMAS acrostic. What a beautiful name it is.
